Secrets of Shambhala: Inside Reggie Ray's Crestone Cult
Chogyam Trungpa’s most prized student replicates his troubled legacy. Students and staff accuse Reggie Ray of narcissistic abuse, sending students to solitary for punishment, coercing them to drink during meditation sessions, yelling at them, publicly tearing them down, utilizing spies, keeping blacklists, distancing students from family and more.
PART I: In Pema Chodron's Shadow
Be Scofield is a prominent cult reporter whose work is cited by the NY Times, Rolling Stone, People, Netflix, and more. She exposed the Love Has Won cult which led to the hit HBO series. Be is the author of Hunting Lucifer: One Reporter's Search for Cults and Demons.
By BE SCOFIELD
9/23/24
“I’ve seen Reggie make Tami Simon cry many times,” a former Dharma Ocean board member named "Peter" told me. Tami’s status as founder of Sounds True couldn’t protect her from Reggie Ray’s abuse several ex-staff said. Worth millions at the time, Tami revolutionized the spiritual audiobook world. By 2002, when she first began following Ray, she had produced spoken word programs with the likes of Deepak Chopra, Pema Chodron and Andrew Weil.
“Reggie would get incredibly threatened when a student became a teacher,” Peter said. On Tami’s first day as a teacher he publicly tore her apart in a group setting. “He said, ‘Oh you think you’re hot shit? You think teaching is a way to become famous? You want to build your business?” He stressed the severity of the mission. “You’ve got to be prepared to die,” Ray said.
The following day Ray flipped. “I love Tami, she’s incredible,” he told the group of students. Peter described this as a “cycle of breaking students down and building them up," which was a common tactic of abuse he used.
Tami Simon would go on to become one of Ray’s most senior teachers and serve on the board of his organization. For years she traveled and taught in the lineage of “the great Tibetan meditation teacher Chogyam Trungpa” as her bio from the time stated. She also published numerous audiobooks, courses and books by Ray on Sounds True. Prior to all of this she studied at Trungpa's Naropa University.
Former Dharma Ocean student and staff member of 17 years Erin Anderson told me Tami was a "tough, intimidating person, both as a teacher and individual." She described her as "very aloof." Anderson was "always on guard around her" fearing she may say the wrong thing or trigger Tami to react. She said Tami would refer to "calling people on their shit" as "hitting them with a dharmic hand grenade."
"Kyle" was a long-term student and meditation instructor. When Ray required them to renew their teaching credential Tami was his instructor. She prevented him from graduating to exert the type of control and dominance that Ray encouraged, Kyle alleges. “Tami was aggressive,” he said. “She’ll say the thing that cuts you down.”
“Tami was always cool, sometimes cold and calculating,” said "Sarah." She was one of Ray’s former personal assistants and spent 14 years in his group. She shared some private info with Tami about Ray and suspects she shared it with him. “The next thing I knew I was no longer in the running to be the director." She told me Tami was "really into it when she was the star,” but that "she'd throw you under the bus in a heartbeat.”
"Tami had some charisma," a former long-term student named "Erica" told me. "She took the Samaya vow to Reggie and also had students under her. He used to show her off as an example of how you can tell a teacher by their students." She said Tami was the head of a particular franchise called Meditating With the Body and would teach many weekend-long programs. "Tami did not do a lot of the Vajrayana practices, she stayed doing the bodywork stuff. She was not a hardcore Tibetan practitioner."
Students with money were often fast-tracked to the role of teacher or staff and Tami was one of them. Not long after Ray began Dharma Ocean in 2005 Tami became a senior teacher in the tradition. “It was always very obvious who were the chosen people," a former long-term student named "Jordan" told me. "Tami was one of the royalty around Reggie. He had his cadre."
“Tami and Al Blum were looking for some ground to build themselves up as teachers,” Anderson told me. Several former staff members reported to me that Blum funded the building of the Dharma Ocean retreat center to the tune of millions. He too became a teacher. "With donations from Tami and Al, they purchased a home for Reggie in Crestone," a former long-term staff member told me. “I’d be surprised if Tami hadn’t given millions to Reggie in her time there,” said Sarah.
The Battle for Chogyam Trungpa's Kingdom
Students had growing concerns about being sent to the Shambhala lineage head Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche to take their vows. At one of the private student weekend gatherings at Shambhala Mountain Center in early November, 2004 a group of around 30 students arranged a formal meeting with Reggie Ray at a home on the campus. “They asked him to not send them to the Sakyong to enter the Vajrayana,” Jered Morgan told me. He was involved for over 15 years. “They asked for pointing out instructions from Reggie.”
Knowing of the increased tension with the Sakyong leadership, Tami took Ray to Crestone in late November to show him a home. "I think they put an offer in during that trip," Jered told me. Thanks to Tami and Al Blum's financial contributions they purchased the home and then soon after the land for the retreat center. They also bought an 80-acre parcel. Both properties were purchased from Hannah Strong. "By March we had our first weekend gathering of students," Jered said.
The split between Reggie Ray and Shambhala became official during the winter Dathun of December 2004 and January 2005. Both Ray and the Sakyong had homes at Shambhala Mountain Center (now Drala Mountain Center). Over the next days and weeks Ray tried to negotiate a power-share. He told the Sakyong he’d be willing to stay in Shambhala if he could take Vajrayana students. The Sakyong wouldn’t give up any power, however.
“He’d report back to us every day on his heated negotiations,” Jered said. “He enlisted the help of all the attendees at the Dathun,” he said of the 150 participants. “He asked us to do special practices to aid him. We were doing these hardcore deity practices invoking wrathful protector deities to aid in Reggie’s battle against the Sakyong.”
The dramatic events served as a foundation myth for the wide-eyed students, many of whom were new. The Sakyong and Ray were directly competing for the spiritual authority of Trungpa. “The Sakyong claimed he was the king of the realm and properly empowered,” Jered said. “Reggie claimed that he was teaching the true lineage of Trungpa, that it fell on him to carry on the true spiritual lineage.” The Sakyong pushed him from the tradition, however. “Reggie was asked to leave Shambhala if he insisted on giving his students pointing out instructions.”
The break must have been bittersweet as Ray had been the most prized teacher within the Shambhala lineage. He was one of the original acharyas appointed by Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche. In 1997 he became the first teacher in residence at Shambhala Mountain Center and taught the esteemed month-long Dathun retreats. Ray also co-founded the religious studies department at Trungpa’s Naropa University and taught there for decades. He was a proverbial cash cow for Shambhala.
For 17 years from 1970-1987 Ray had been trained, or more accurately, abused by his guru. As previously reported, Trungpa was a cocaine-using alcoholic who had sex with teenage girls, married seven “sex consort” wives and slept with countless students. His Shambhala tradition functioned more-like a Buddhist-military sex cult.
“Being with Trungpa was really terrifying on a daily basis,” Ray said in a 2016 talk. “Being in his lineage and community, it was torture.” In a dharma talk from 2014 Ray said he would be “overcome with terror” sitting next to Trungpa. On retreat with him Ray said he constantly felt like throwing up. “I spent half my time trying to be closer to him and the other half trying to get away from him.”
“Being with Trungpa was really terrifying on a daily basis. It was torture." - Reggie Ray
Ray came to Trungpa in a state of desperation and undoubtedly formed a trauma bond with him. Trungpa taught that his abuse and chaos was good for spiritual growth. Ray says he was “just completely messed up,” when Trungpa found and saved him in 1970. "I was literally suicidally depressed, unbelievable darkness," Ray said in an interview about his early struggles. "I thought I'd never have a life. The only solace I had is that I could kill myself. I was in that state for seven years."
“Reggie was emotionally abused by his mother pretty badly,” Jered said. "He’d tell stories of his mother playing street hockey with his friends and bashing into people as an illustration of how tough and cold she was." His father was a stock trader who lived in New York during the week and only came home on the weekends. "I think he had a lonely childhood," Jered said. Erin Anderson told me Ray "would harp about how cold his mother was; 'my mother fucked me up for life,’ kind of thing."
"He talked about his troubled past as a way to illustrate the power of Trungpa," Jered said. Ray would "famously talk about how utterly psychologically messed up he was and then say 'I met Trungpa.'"
Having broken from Mipham and Shambhala, Ray focused on Crestone. The name of their new group, Dharma Ocean, was a translation of Trungpa's name meaning "Ocean of Dharma." In the summer of 2005 they hosted their first retreat, a Vajrayana Training Intensive, separate from Shambhala. The group rented the entire White Eagle hotel to host the gathering. The now defunct hotel would become their teaching base over the next several years. The stated mission of the organization was to propagate Trungpa's teachings.
“He talked about Trungpa all the time," Jered told me. "He claimed he was empowered by him in dreams, in the spirit realm." He said Ray claimed to be the one true living heir of Trungpa. "That's why we were special, we were the only ones carrying on his true lineage. And he told us it required huge financial, emotional and time investments."
By 2011 Dharma Ocean had completed a 5 million dollar retreat center in Crestone called Blazing Mountain. A small group of wealthy donors that included Al Blum, Tami Simon, Ray's new wife Caroline Pfohl, Lisette Cooper, and a few others were major contributors to the Dharma Ocean project and its further operation. Pfohl too was fast-tracked to spiritual seniority in the organization, being made co-lineage holder and "Desung" or spiritual protector of the group. In 2017 Ray made her the sole lineage holder in an elaborate ceremony. Ray left his wife Lee Ray of 30 years for the younger, richer, Pfohl who was worth tens of millions and also one of his students. “He absolutely courted people with money,” Sarah said.
Tami Simon Breaks Away
“Tami Simon could end Dharma Ocean in a second,” Peter told me. “Tami knew Reggie was a narcissist. Once she realized, she quietly left but never said anything.” Erica had wished Tami would have spoken out. “I hoped Tami could have protected people from Reggie better than anyone else but she failed," she told me. "I wish she would drop his products and say a few words about him to protect students.”
Tami's exodus happened after Ray publicly shamed her around 2017. The sangha had known Tami was advocating for a less-strict Ngondro practice. She hadn't been teaching to his exact specifications. "Even our most senior teachers don't want to do the practices!" Ray shouted during a public session. "I shouldn't have allowed students to progress without finishing the Ngondro." He didn't mention her name but was staring intently at her the entire time. "Tami and the others knew Reggie was referring to her," an ex-staff member named "Molly" said. "I saw Tami with tears coming down her face when she was being attacked,” Peter said. "Tami was crying for days afterwards," Molly told me.
"Tami was crying for days afterwards."
Tami Simon does, however, still handsomely profit off of Ray's previous catalogue and from Chogyam Trungpa's teachings. Despite knowing the extent of Ray's abuses first-hand, she continues to sell dozens of his books and online courses. She's had a mixed response to her authors being exposed, removing some and continuing to platform others.
Her continued profiting from Ray seems to contradict her reasoning for starting Sounds True. "A lack of congruence in somebody saying something but meaning something else is highly disturbing to me," she says. "Part of what I wanted in starting Sounds True was to work with and record and be in contact with and put out the work of people who had a congruence in their inner life and in their vocal expression and in the work they were trying to do—where it all lined up."
A "Sophisticated" Abuser
“I told Reggie that I was having problems with my parents and he suggested that I not speak to them and 'never go back.' I didn’t talk to my parents for ten years.” - Former senior staff member
On October 7th, 2019 a group of 12 former staff and students published an open letter alleging a wide range of cult-like psychological, emotional and spiritual abuses by Reggie Ray. A website called Leaving Dharma Ocean now chronicles an array of statements from the scandal. Those who came forward were some of the most devoted, loyal followers. They included personal assistants to Ray, board members, senior students of 15+ years and staff.
The dam started to break when Kristin Luce published an article in 2016 about Reggie Ray without naming him. "I once worked for an influential and charismatic teacher who also yelled at, humiliated and discredited the very people who were supporting him," she wrote. "He scolded his staff of volunteers loudly and publicly...Collusion was a key feature of how he kept his power, by anointing some while demonizing others, and then reversing course or demoting people whenever it suited him."
"Reggie saw the article and he lost his mind and immediately developed a new set of teachings about the criticism," Molly told me. "It was a new teaching called the Three Samayas." Everyone had to renew their vows to Ray. Those who didn't were fired or banished. "We had already taken the Samaya vow to him but it was now no longer good," Erin Anderson told me. "All of our credentials were gone unless we did this." Anderson refused to take the new course and instead changed her status to "inactive" with Dharma Ocean. "The three Samaya vows are actually given as the one and only protection against Vajra hell," Reggie said.
In 2018 Ray's students began posting about his abuses in the Dharma Ocean facebook group and on Reddit. Ray had those who spoke up purged from the group and eventually ordered that it be shut down entirely. The organization then hired Lama Rod Owens to "facilitate a discussion about harm in Dharma Ocean." Caroline Pfohl was there in addition to some members of the sangha. "When Owens read a list of characteristics of cults, Caroline turned to me and whispered, 'I think we have all of them,'" Peter told me.
Ray dismissed the allegations, blaming them on students "not wanting to meditate" and "making things up." He also accused them of "trying to take over Dharma Ocean." Ray said, "these are people for whom the practice was not that important."
Dharma Ocean board chair Michael Mischke-Reeds contacted An Olive Branch organization in August 2019 to conduct an independent investigation. The non-profit submitted a $20,000 proposal to Dharma Ocean on October 9th.
Peter was on the board and he said he pushed Ray to take action. "I told him this was serious. He needs to step down during the time period, hire an independent organization to investigate and interview people and take appropriate measures otherwise I'd leave." To his surprise Ray agreed with him. "The two directors of An Olive Branch interviewed Ray but concluded they couldn't work with him," Peter told me. The independent investigation never commenced.
Ray turned out to be hostile to any truth-finding process. He fired an ombudsperson who had been hired citing their lack of "Ngondro practice" and "spiritual insufficiency." On October 15th he released a convoluted video statement that blamed the crisis merely on him being "inconsistent" in his approaches with students. In a Facebook post Ray urged his students to renew their faith. "In these dark days, when the world seems to be going insane, and even our friends are attacking us and spreading poison about us, and even demonizing our teachers, the only thing to be done is to return with renewed faith, devotion, and commitment to our practice," he wrote.
"Reggie tore us down, called us mafia and degenerate people."
When the criticisms emerged online his most devoted students expressed a cult-like response. “It was like he could do no wrong," a former staff member named "Anne" told me of people defending him on Facebook. "They believed everything he said and did was helpful for people. Everything he does is enlightened." For years many students had visualized Ray above their head as a Buddha giving them blessings. "We 100% knew that we were taking our vows to Reggie," Jered told me.
Despite the devotion, people in the hundreds and then thousands worldwide abandoned the group. Within months the organization was in a free fall collapse. Financial records show Dharma Ocean lost hundreds of thousands every year beginning in 2018 since the scandal unfolded. In 2019 alone they lost over one million. In every previous year the organization had substantial positive income.
In November, 2019 Ray fired Peter, the remaining voting board member, and soon implemented a new board that he placed himself on. He and Caroline then switched focus to Dharma Ocean Europe where he began collecting a cadre of new followers. For a period the Dharma Ocean property and retreat center in Crestone was for sale. "He never intended to close Dharma Ocean," Peter said. "It was all a ruse to divert attention from the growing scandal. He told me he was closing but he knew he wasn’t really doing it."
Ray has since returned to Crestone and has periodically taught retreats and courses at Dharma Ocean. He apparently is not using his name publicly on advertisements, rather he is quietly appearing and leading the events. The Dharma Ocean website lists Caroline Pfohl as the "prime lineage holder" and a current teacher.
Drinking Lessons
One of the methods Reggie Ray used to "soften" his students was alcohol. He was highly paranoid according to former students. He perceived even the most mild questions or disagreements as a challenge to his authority. "If you disagree with him, you disagree with the lineage, which is basically disagreeing with God," writes former staff member Erin Anderson.
"At a Vajrayana Training Intensive during a retreat someone asked a question in the group and Reggie perceived him to be uptight," Jered told me. "Reggie said, 'You got to relax.'" Ray then instructed the student to take a gulp of sake. "He'd then check in and say notice how you're feeling." The student was instructed to drink more, check in, and then drink more. This was happening in the middle of a Q&A during a spiritual retreat in public. He continued drinking until Ray felt he was sufficiently subservient.
During a board meeting Ray coerced a board member into drinking a large tumbler of sake in less than five minutes. She had asked a question that Ray perceived as challenging him. "Ray moved next to her and put his feet on top of her feet," Peter told me. "He was very close. Reggie said to her, 'You've got to be with me. I want you to relax.'" Peter said Ray then instructed his attendant to get a glass and bottle of sake. "He then led her drinking like a guided meditation." She'd take a drink and he'd say, "good, now relax," and he'd wait a few moments. "Now take another drink." She'd take a big gulp and he'd continue. "He got her to drink sake until she was drunk."
"Teaching meditation is a dangerous art. It's a contact sport." - Reggie Ray
Peter said it wasn't uncommon for Ray to resort to such behavior. "He did that multiple times," he said. "In retreat session he'd get someone to drink three drinks of sake in 20-30 seconds. He’d frame it in 'you need to relax.' It was very much a follow on of Trungpa's 'drinking was a proxy for being in a relaxed spiritual state' type thinking." Jered echoed this. "He’d induce us into meditation and then guide us to progressively take large gulps of sake."
"There were people made to drink in excess," Jordan told me. "Every week there'd be a big feast." A female student was coerced by Ray to drink to a point where she had to throw up the next to the White Eagle hotel. "The next day she told me she was so hung over."
Jered described a similar incident that happened to him.
On the final night of the program, we had a celebratory formal ritual feast. The evening included moderate servings of alcohol, in the form of sake. As the night was winding down, some of us were standing in Reggie's kitchen talking. There was an undrunk large container of sake, roughly 12-16 ounces. Having already consumed a moderate amount, I was not interested in voluntarily consuming more sake. Reggie instructed me to down the entire container of sake. I immediately felt woozy, close to vomiting. But with the steely resolve of a truly devoted student, under the watchful eye of my teacher and peers, I didn't flinch. This was met with praise from my beloved teacher, and audible sounds of admiration from my peers. 'What a great moment,' I thought.
"Later that year, Reggie would instruct me to separate from my parents, to not speak to them, which I did for the next ten years, until I finally woke up from this horrific spell in 2015," Jered told me. "He basically convinced me that my mother was evil."
Solitary Punishment
"It was abundantly clear that Reggie viewed the lives of the people who had worked with him for decades with precious little respect. In fact, it actually seemed to me that he viewed our lives with something very near contempt." – Neil McKinley, former senior Dharma Ocean teacher
Long-term student Jordan once asked Ray a question during the Q&A on a retreat. He interpreted their inquiry as questioning his authority, however. “I was banished from the retreat in solitary for a couple of days,” they told me. “Then I had to be interrogated by him and Caroline to ensure I was subservient.” They said Ray and his wife would sit side-by-side in the office. “You’d have to sit across from them. Caroline would sit there stone-faced as Reggie asked a bunch of questions. ‘Who do you think you are testing my authority?’ he’d say.”
Despite being in solitary retreat for two days it wasn’t enough to calm Ray’s paranoia. “He felt like I was a threat to his space and I had to watch from a closed circuit space,” they said.
A few days later Ray called them up in front of the group while everyone was supposed to be silently meditating. “He starts hugging me and saying, ‘I love you Jordan, I love you.'” When they got home they sent an email to him. “I’ve decided that you are too neurotic and needy,” he wrote back. “I need to not hear from you for a year.”
A former personal assistant of Ray named "Anne" told me she saw him also send someone to solitary retreat. A staff member coordinated a retreat that was renting the center. “The teacher drank sake with the students on the retreat and Reggie freaked out,” Anne said. Ray sent the program coordinator to solitary for a few days for punishment, despite the issue not being his fault. "Reggie came down so hard on him."
In 2007 Ray banned long-term student Jered Morgan from Dharma Ocean and even from living in Colorado. “Don’t come to programs and you can’t live in Colorado,” Ray told him. "I had already estranged myself from my parents and had cut off any other support systems at his urging. All my friends were in Dharma Ocean. I organized my entire life around this. I did not pursue professional training for many years so I could go to programs at his urging." Jered suspects Ray kicked him out because he drove a couple from Crestone to the Denver airport and charged a normal fee. He said he had no money and desperately needed the funds. Ray was livid, however. "You were always on Reggie’s shit list and you never knew it," Jered said.
For the next year Jered was homeless living in a van in Seattle doing odd jobs and handy work. He had donated his last $1,000 in the prior months to Dharma Ocean. "It was a good 1.5 years before I was formally invited back," Jered said. He never moved back to Colorado but traveled to retreats.
Ex-staff say it was common for Ray to threaten their jobs and role in the community. It served to keep everyone on eggshells, never knowing who would disappear next.
"The higher up someone was, the more abusive he got," Molly told me. "He would start a conflict with a student, put the whole retreat into silence or send them away into solitary retreat for days." She said when the person came back they were "totally subservient" and would often feel like there was something wrong with them.
Several former staff members said Ray kept blacklists of students. They said it was common for students to quietly disappear from the group without explanation and that Ray would offer some erroneous reason for their departure. "Reggie is fond of making lists, and he made dozens of lists delineating the types of people who caused problems in the sangha," Erin Anderson writes. Anne told me Ray had a list of around 30 people that were banned. Other lists designated a variety of "indiscretions."
Ray would often use a student's desire to teach as a way to string them along. He would eventually show them "in one way or another that they are not good enough, loyal enough, and that the path they had followed was about obedience, not dharma teaching," Molly said. One student had completed the rigorous Ngondro practice in four years only to have Ray strip the credentials of his accomplishment and make him redo the entire thing.
Tearing Down Students
"That same feeling of terror that Reggie felt around Trungpa is what we felt around Reggie." - Jered Morgan
Former students and staff allege Reggie Ray would tear them down and publicly shame them. He'd yell at people and create drama and then rationalize his behavior as him being spiritually superior when students were confused or upset. “Behind closed doors Reggie was a tyrant," Sarah said. "He humiliated people and used the dharma to justify it.” Erin Anderson told me, “Reggie believes everything he is doing is right because he learned it from Trungpa.”
Sarah described a time when Ray agreed to let her take a coffee table only to be later berated by him. “He said I had stolen it. He was yelling at me, saying people take things from him and they steal.” Another time he yelled at her wrongly thinking she disclosed information to his wife Lee. “He was accusing me and berating me,” she told me. A few days later he realized it wasn’t Sarah after all.
Sarah said Ray berated the kitchen staff in front of the group for entering slightly late after they finished their work. “He was humiliating these people who were doing service,” she told me. "These are teachings that may never be heard again," Ray told the audience. He spoke about disrespect and said, "These are important things that need to be heard and need to be said."
One time Reggie reduced Erin Anderson to tears. He asked her to write an email and convey a message to someone. He wasn't happy with how she expressed his message. "Reggie was furious," she writes. "He called me into his office and I sat down at a table with him and Caroline. He proceeded to tell me, 'When I tell you to do something, you do it exactly as I tell you', with such intensity that you would have thought the world was ending because this person did not receive a necessary transmission through the message, the way I had worded it. The consequences of my action could be dire. We couldn’t know."
Caroline played her typical stone-faced role. "She did not make eye contact with me, and did not say one word, through the entire meeting," Anderson writes. "She was present, but inaccessible. I was utterly unable to defend myself, and at some point I started crying." Ray eventually stopped his tirade and asked, "What's going on with you? Why are you crying?" in a gentle manner. "If I had been honest, I would have said, 'I’m crying because I don’t know how to be myself, and be what you want me to be, at the same time. For fuck’s sake I’m crying because you’re yelling at me, Caroline is sitting here watching and it feels weird.' But that was not the right answer."
Instead, Anderson talked about how her childhood shaped her and made her "unable to do things like write this email" the way he wanted it written.
"If I had been honest, I would have said I’m crying because you’re yelling at me, Caroline is sitting here watching and it feels weird."
Sarah witnessed Ray tear a student down during a talk at Kripalu. “Reggie ripped her to shreds in public when she was really grieving over this relationship,” she said. "She was on the mic talking about a relationship that she was distraught about, asking for his wisdom." He started going at her. “You know how you are!" Ray proclaimed. "This is what you do! You’re doing this again and you know what you're doing!” Sarah said he "put her down in this really strict way in front of all of us."
Tami Simon speaks about meditation in Dharma Ocean
In 2018 a former staff member named Rayann Gordon witnessed Ray tear apart a volunteer. She and the volunteer were called to his office where Ray berated the volunteer for not liking how a vow ceremony was supposed to be prepared. She said Caroline and Ray sat "side by side" in front of them as Ray questioned the volunteer about their relationship to authority and hierarchy. "Caroline and I sat mostly silent throughout the meeting, often looking at the floor and letting Reggie pummel, interrogate and create a lot of confusion for the volunteer," she writes. Rayann says she and the volunteer were "completely stunned" as they were both devoted students dedicated to running the retreat smoothly. She said it only ended by the volunteer affirming their loyalty over and over again. A few hours later Ray performed his love/terror flip. “Marty, you’re still my wing man, right?” Ray said to him in the public group.
"Reggie would create the drama, take it out on the student and then publicly discuss it," Molly said. The open letter states that he "constantly used triangulation to manipulate students, manufacturing rumors and making students doubt themselves." It says he "would harshly criticize a student to others in a staff meeting, and then blithely say something entirely different to the student he had just defamed." They accuse him of frequently making up information about someone and then asking them to their face to test how they'd respond. "A culture of paranoia, fear, and shame was rampant."
“He yelled at me all the time. If something doesn’t go his way he’d yell.”
“He once completely shut me down in a staff meeting with seven others,” Anne told me. “I asked a question about meditation and he told me I wasn’t a good practitioner. He said I was having problems because I wasn’t meditating right.” She said "there were times where he was really mean" to her. “It felt like he was always yelling at me.”
In 2017 a queer member of the sangha suggested during a Q&A that Dharma Ocean could be more inclusive to LGBTQ people. They shared their experience of being in the group. Reggie became livid. "You're not welcome here," Ray shouted. He also said what they were feeling wasn't real. "He told them to just leave, I can’t help you," a former staff member said. "He was yelling and so blatantly saying that they were wrong," Erin Anderson told me. According to Anderson this type of abuse was common at the mic. "It would get dark," she said.
Jordan recalls a time that Ray berated them on a call. “He ripped me apart on the phone," they said. "Who do you think you are? what makes you think you can teach this?” he angrily told them. Ray always wanted more teachers in his lineage but was simultaneously threatened by them. "I have PTSD and terror responses from my time in Dharma Ocean," Jordan said. "I know people have had their mental health destroyed by it."
One of the tools Ray used to control students and staff was access to his inner circle. "Fear of losing their place in the coveted inner circle often prevented members from voicing questions or criticism about behavior they witnessed," the open letter states. "Those who voiced criticism about him or some aspect of the organization were often swiftly excluded from the inner circle and the program staff roles that are the testing ground for it."
Be Scofield
Ray was also highly particular and demanding in his ways. "On a whim he’d call you in the middle of the night and people would do whatever he asked," a former staff member told me. "He'd walk in like a king," Sarah said. "The kitchen would be going nuts. He had to have these exact things, it had to be fresh, hot...etc. but he wouldn't tell them when he's going to be there. Yet, it has to be ready at the exact moment. Everyone is running around like a crazy person trying to make sure we weren’t going to piss him off." She said this type of fear was an "everyday" thing in Dharma Ocean.
A Network of Spies
“There were no secrets,” Anne told me. “We had to tell Reggie the things we were hearing. Reggie would often go after students or cause problems based on the information that was revealed to him.” She said, "Everyone was essentially a spy for Reggie."
Like Trungpa, Ray had his own Kasung or military branch of protectors. "We wore all black and were stealth body guards," Erin Anderson told me. "By protecting him we were protecting the dharma." She said they acted as "police on the inside." Former students describe an environment where others are rewarded for turning in students or tearing others down. Private information was weaponized to control and shame people.
Erin Anderson told Reggie in an email that he did indeed shame someone and they left as a result. "I shouldn’t really be telling you this but he had some pretty serious mental health problems and I will tell them to you if you want,” Ray told her. “No, I don’t want you to tell me his confidential mental health issues," Anderson replied. She said she was close with her friend and knew he didn't have these mental health problems. “Reggie then said, 'Some people just can’t hang in there and they leave and it just happened.'"
Many former staff and students said Ray’s wife Caroline was the “good” cop and Ray was the “bad” cop. She was charming and sweet and feigned care but it was a ruse they said. She would relay information to Ray. One time Erin joked to Caroline about being afraid of how Ray would react to something. "Reggie called me and said, "We need to talk." They met and he berated her. "Caroline told me what you said the other day about being afraid of me and how I react," Ray told her.
When Ray sent Jordan to solitary retreat for two days Caroline came and visited. Caroline took them for a walk and played sympathetic during their time of punishment. "I know Reggie can be very direct,” Caroline told her in an assuring tone. Jordan later worried she was merely gathering intel on her mind state.
“Caroline used healing sessions to pull confidential information out of us and then share it with Reggie,” Erica told me. A former staff member told me Caroline would say things like, “Your throat chakra is blocked, tell me what’s going on.” The context of a spiritual environment meant students were primed to confess their traumas and problems. “We were mortified that Caroline broke confidentiality and we were being told that all of our deepest wounds are a lie, saying it’s baggage, that you can’t enter the Vajrayana," Erica said.
During a 2009 talk Ray alludes to the fact that he got information from Caroline and others.
It’s interesting that that registers in their bodies. And you know, Caroline and I talk, and it’s you know, so now interestingly I have actually a reference point to check my perception against which is the person’s actual body, which Caroline works with. Of course this is of very, very great benefit for all of us that the information that I’m holding becomes more and more accurate, because then I can be more and more helpful. But the thing is, I need your cooperation. I need your cooperation…I can’t carry you through the door into the vajra world...When we go through the door we have to be naked. We have to be naked. We have to give up and abandon any of our baggage. I think sometimes you might feel that I, when I say things to you that I get them from other people. Lately a couple of people have said to me, “Well you’re getting this from somebody else. You’ve taken somebody else’s view of me.”
During the same talk Ray referred to the attempted suicide of a member that was heavily impacting students. "We really can give up our friend’s suicide attempt," he told them. "It’s OK. We can let it go. It’s no big deal. People kill themselves all the time. What’s the big fucking deal? People die all the time. People do all kinds of things."
"It’s no big deal. People kill themselves all the time. What’s the big fucking deal?"
In this talk and others Ray stressed that people's traumas weren't real and that they should just be abandoned. "There have been a few cases of people that I know that all of a sudden, 'I was sexually abused as a child. This is it. This is me,'” Ray said in the talk. "The Vajrayana really is ruthless, because we have to leave all of it at the door if we want to enter the vajra world. The vajra world is a very high demand for nakedness. And we have to let it go. We have to let go of me...We really can give up our dramas."
The Price of a Lineage
"At a certain point, I became so sick, literally so sick, physically and so sick mentally that I had to get out." – Neil McKinley, former senior Dharma Ocean teacher
Caroline's entry into Dharma Ocean is troublesome. In a talk, Ray admits he tried to convince her then husband Robert Hung-Ngai Ho to leave her. Robert was an extremely wealthy businessman in China. In 2005 he came to a talk by Ray in the U.S. When he returned Caroline heard one of Ray's CD's that he had. She began listening to Ray's teachings from afar and visited the next year.
"She showed up and she was actually slightly pissed off that I had been encouraging Robert to leave his wife," Ray said in Caroline's empowerment ceremony. "She was like what's up with you that you're encouraging people to do this kind of stuff?" It appears Ray tampered with his relationship. "He was trying to find himself and he couldn't figure out where he was," Ray said.
When Caroline showed up on the scene Ray had been married for 30 years to Lee Ray. "We initially were both students of Trungpa," Ray says of himself and Lee. "She's been a very, very important part of all of it down all these years." Many students had photos of Reggie Ray and Lee on their alters and Lee would occasionally teach. Ex-followers told me Ray had worked diligently to build Lee up as a feminine deity.
"As soon as Caroline showed up Reggie started trashing Lee," Jered Morgan said. "Before that we never knew or heard about any of it. Then he started saying she was an alcoholic, and abusive, and had all these problems." He said the transition from Lee to Caroline was odd. "Caroline and Robert were still kinda together...and then they weren't. And then Robert just kind of disappears. And then Reggie is all googly-eyed over Caroline and is like a teenager in love. All right in front of Lee. It was extremely weird."
When the younger, more beautiful, and richer Caroline entered the picture Ray tried to turn the group against Lee. "She went from a saint to a demon overnight in his eyes," Jered said. "I always hoped I would never fall in love with a student," Ray would say.
Kyle said two prominent students got kicked out of Dharma Ocean for having relationships with students. He noted the irony because Ray began dating Caroline who had been his student for many months.
"They are my children." - Reggie Ray speaking about his students
Caroline showed up in 2006 and just a year later he had made her co-lineage holder of the entire Dharma Ocean tradition. “I’m going to open myself to you completely,” Caroline says to him. “Will you hold this lineage with me?” Ray said to her. The same divine pedestal that Ray had put Lee on was set up for Caroline. She would become his fourth wife.
Sarah once saw an email Ray had written to a member in the community. The member’s wife had major complications during pregnancy where she or the baby might die. The student had written to Ray that “something beautiful and peaceful came into the room.” Ray told him that it was Caroline manifesting as White Tara. "One of her manifestations is as White Tara. She must have come to your room. She healed and kept your wife and child safe. She was responsible for the baby living.” Sarah said this was the exact same type of thing Ray had done with Lee. "He made her out to be some kind of deity."
Soon enough Caroline was a "Desung" or spiritual protector of the group, co-lineage holder and a spiritual teacher. “It was absolute nepotism," a former staff member told me. "There’s so many people who have so many skills.” Peter told me, “Caroline had no training and didn’t have to do the practices.” He said Ray just “bypassed” all the rigorous requirements for her. “There were some really good students but Caroline would get bumped in front to lead programs, have titles and she was terrible.”
Not only had Ray magically empowered himself to lead a new Vajrayana lineage but he magically empowered Caroline with spiritual authority and as the lineage holder.
"Reggie would be done if it wasn’t for her," Molly told me. "Caroline worked in PR, was incredibly magnetizing and she funded Dharma Ocean for years." Ex-staff said Caroline would have given millions over the years. The former staff members said Caroline is worth tens of millions based on her former marriage. She was also the executive vice president of Coca-Cola China.
In 2007, soon after Caroline arrived at Dharma Ocean, she started the Hemera Foundation. Peter refers to it as a "charity front" that funneled money to Reggie Ray's group. It's also based in Bermuda which means it is not subject to the same transparency of U.S. based non-profits whose financial filings are publicly available. Hemera Foundation began with a $65 million endowment, which ex-staff believe came from her divorce from Robert.
Despite her wealth and connections, Caroline, like Tami Simon, couldn't avoid Ray's abuses. Caroline told a former staff member he had berated her. “He’d been calling from a retreat and getting mad at Caroline about everything and swearing at her,” they told me.
"Lee didn’t want to go, but it was not her choice," writes Erin Anderson. "There was drama in the transition." She says members had to choose between the two. "We were told that we had to make a choice in terms of our spiritual allegiance — Reggie, or Lee. Some people chose to become students of Lee alone, and to her credit, she did persist as a teacher in her own right."
"Reggie had realized that it was Caroline who was needed to continue this lineage on," Anderson says. "He did not say as much, of course, but Caroline’s pocketbook is deep, and that benefited him, and it benefited Dharma Ocean." She said the way Ray divinely built up Caroline was "hauntingly similar to how Reggie had always spoken of Lee."
In 2017 Ray made Caroline the sole lineage holder in an elaborate ceremony. "Next Saturday I'm going to empower her as my successor in all senses," Ray said in her empowerment talk. "She is going to be the first empowered lineage holder, fully empowered lineage holder to do everything that I do. I'm going to entrust this community and this lineage to her. Caroline will be carrying on when I'm gone."
"We interrupted the meditation retreat and hiked up Kit Carson and named Caroline the lineage holder," Peter told me. “She earned that with money and by subduing to his wishes."
It was common for Ray to use promises of spiritual advancement to drag students along. "For months before Caroline's empowerment ceremony Reggie said that he would be empowering David Iozzi, Neil Mckinlay, and Caroline 'to do everything that he does,'" Molly told me. "At the last minute Reggie and Caroline had a talk and decided that only she should be empowered. They had dangled the carrot in front of David and Neil, both longtime senior teachers, then at the last moment snatched it away."
"Caroline was teaching high level spiritual lessons without the proper training," Jordan said. "We were to look for her for guidance and supposed to take direction from her when she had never done Ngondro." Jered Morgan said that Caroline "famously refused to do Ngondro." Ray said "she didn't need to do Ngondro because she was naturally spiritually gifted."
Peter described how he had initially genuinely believed in Caroline. "I trusted her," he said. "I would confide more and more." For years he thought she was a force for change. But then he discovered she had told him one thing only to be acting completely opposite behind the scenes. "Little did I know she was telling Reggie stuff," Peter said. "When I went public with my concerns she flipped and took his side. All my meetings with her, it was all fake, she was just leading me on.”
Erin Anderson says that Caroline has enabled Ray. Despite him being accused of a variety of abuses Caroline has never spoken up. She also acknowledged to Peter that Dharma Ocean had many cult-like attributes. "Over the past year particularly, Reggie ran roughshod over the entire community, with Caroline mute at the moments when she could have spoken," Anderson writes. "At crucial moments, for so many people."
"I’m more scared of the damage that Caroline could do at the helm than Reggie," Peter said. "With Caroline it’s so charming and more veiled. It's more secret. She can hide cult dynamics better."
Transmitting Abuse
"Sounds True presents itself as an enlightened environment but in reality, it is remarkably dysfunctional." - Former employee
In 2023 a 22-year veteran editor and program host of Sounds True and one of Tami Simon's most trusted employees was arrested for having 6,000 images of child sex abuse. Mitchell Clute had edited and worked with Eckhart Tolle, Pema Chodron, Jack Kornfield, Peter Levine, Adyashanti, Deepak Chopra and more. "The case has sent shockwaves through the Boulder community, especially given Clute’s previous role as a respected figure at Sounds True," it was reported.
"I always love editing Pema's talks because her kindness and heartfelt connection come through in everything she says," Clute said. It's been shown that Pema Chodron covered up sexual abuse within Shambhala Buddhism. Also, in 2019 the Denver Post found that, "Shambhala and its leaders had a decades-long history of suppressing abuse allegations, including child molestation and clerical abuse, through the organization’s own internal processes."
Mitchell Clute joined Sounds True in 2001, the same year that Tami Simon began following Reggie Ray. With thousands of programs and a revenue of $60 million per year, Sounds True is the largest broadcaster of new age and spiritual content.
As someone in the lineage of Chogyam Trungpa and a student of Ray, it's not surprising that Tami may be replicating some of their abusive dynamics. Former employees of Sounds True have told me the work environment is "cult-like" and they spoke of Tami's narcissistic tendencies. Multiple Glassdoor reviews from former employees echo the same sentiment with 1.0 star reviews. "A significant proportion of the executive staff was comprised of self-serving narcissists," one wrote. "A truly dysfunctional cult-like company led by a hypocritical charlatan of a narcissist," another says. "A culture of overwork and disempowerment that is nearly cult-like in its ability to keep the dissenters down," a former employee writes. Some sound like Dharma Ocean, "Organizational dysfunction and chaos at the highest levels."
"Simon, however, isn’t willing to put on a mask at the office," wrote Lion's Roar in an interview with Tami. “The idea that we’re one person in our private life and some different person at work is breaking down for a lot of people,” Tami said. “What makes me happy about that is that when people are themselves at work, we will see businesses have different kinds of priorities.”
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